Last week, I was extremely grateful to receive a happy call from an ex-colleague who recently accomplished a major career milestone at a large and reputed global organisation.
Interestingly, this was a person that we had counselled out several years back - my first ever case of doing that dreadful conversation as a first-time people manager. Having closely tracked his performance over the past 18 months, in my mind I was convinced that he would be more successful somewhere else. Yet, my heart dreaded conveying that message to him. I still vividly remember how nervous I was before that meeting and how much my own manager had to coach me for this.
In the hindsight, I realize I was trying to be nice but not helpful.
***
When you are being nice to someone, you may unknowingly be being selfish.
Niceness stems from caring about your own emotions. You don't want to say or do anything that does not feel good.
But if you truly want to do good, try being helpful instead of being nice.
Being helpful means you are putting the other person and their interest at the centre. That may require you to say or do things that may not feel good - to you and to the other person - in that moment.
***
Do your homework well and do what is needed even if it does not make you feel or look good while you are doing it.
Long term gain will trump short term pain.
#career #lifelessons #doingitright